Am I Being Punked?

Don and I went to the Columbia Bottoms Conservation Area today and had a wonderful time. The weather cooperated and it was an absolutely beautiful day.
First up, of course, is the Visitor's Center, which in this case is basically a rebuilt barn. I recommend it highly, especially as a hands-on learning theatre for youngsters. As usual, samples of wildlife are either dangled or stuffed or mounted behind glass to educate us all about the critters that roam this wild area. I took pamphlets, booklets , and information packets to pore over once my hiking experience was done and I'll tell you why.

I've been hiking and/or cycling in these carefully chosen wildlife areas these last few years. But all I know for sure is that the Visitor's Center will be the ONLY place that I will see any of these fascinating creatures (this includes the nature movie continually being played in a darkened classroom at the Center).

Once outside, armed with my books, pamphlets, a mental list of bear and deer tracks, repellants and whistles, I carefully tread on the sacred path created by the conservation department. I keep my senses fully locked and loaded to experience all that nature has to throw at me; my eyes are searching the air , the trees, the bushes, the undergrowth, and the path upon which I step so I can be a respectful and observant partaker of all nature has to offer.

So far I have discovered a baby sock (pink), a guitar pick, a hair thingy, empty shotgun shell casings, various rocks and feathers, and a lone bicycle seat that begs the question- 'where's the rest of the bike?'

I have NOT seen a black, brown, grizzly or polar bear. Nor have I encountered a bobcat, bobwhite, white-tailed deer (except at a farmer's field outside the nature area). There have been no snakes, owls, turkeys, pheasants, or feral dogs, cats, or pigs.

There have, however, been many empty water bottles, bandaid wrappers, wayward shoe inserts, empty bait containers, and even a few articles of clothing I'm surprised have not been missed.

My point is, do the folks in charge of these parks purposely collect these tantilizing examples of wildlife, have a meeting, and then send them off on a brief vacation upon learning of my plans to visit their grounds?

The next time I visit a park I think I'll take the trails and set up my tent in the appropriate area. I'll leave all my maps and insiders guides at home. I'll spend my time seeing and appreciating what is truly there rather than endlessly scan the horizon for what I've been told I should be seeing. Then I'll walk into the visitor's center and ask the ranger to tell me how long these displays have been here, when they've been dusted last, and if they TRULY exist in this area. Maybe I'll even have the wildlife expert take his trusty flashlight and actually show me where one of these little varmints spends his time while avoiding me. A beaver bunker, if you will.
No matter. My thrill with being outdoors in these unique places is not lessened by the absence of animals and birds. I can enjoy myself all by myself if necessary.
But beware. Some day, If I should hear the faint sounds of singing around a campfire late at night, smell critter-type smore's being toasted over a roaring fire, and might just make out the high pitched laughter of forest fawns and raccoons as they share their 'one that got away' story, I'll know it was a well-orchestrated joke played on little old me.